mind over blather

where inescapable facts meet unavoidable conclusions

another idea about the thing

Just when you thought everything was settled, along comes this.

Much better than one of the alternative theories I favored when the Bibliothumparians proposed to add  Unintelligible Design to the local science curriculum (since, after all, evolution, like gravitation, is just a theory).

Speaking from the audience in an auditorium reeking with gleeful anticipation of the End of Daze, I suggested that there should be many alternatives to which students should be exposed since, Praise Bob,  we all believe in free markets . . . and the free market of ideas counts as one of them.

And with that introduction, I suggested the Theory of Transportation, which was premised on the the idea that the universe had been delivered to the wrong address as a result of a cosmic bookkeeping error and had, further, been damaged en route.

Another audience member (I later found out that he was a flak for Popeil Products) suggested the inclusion of Silly String Theory in the physics curriculum – and then spent fifteen minutes deriding the Theory of Transportation using one of Zeno’s Paradoxes to demonstrate that transportation was impossible.

But becoming a Pastafarian certainly has great appeal – especially around dinner time.

So, may His Noodly Appendage touch you soon.



Written by unreal2r

October 3, 2009 at 8:55 PM

2 Responses

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  1. As I may have commented elsewhere, you have to keep in mind the fact that our government was designed by guys who had (for some very good reasons) an overwhelming distrust of government. It is intentionally ineffective, riddled with inefficiency, and prone to miss the whole point on almost any topic. It only coalesces in times of clear and imminent existential threat. It’s not going to make rational, objective decisions about climate extinction and alternative energy until it has no other choice. Assuming it’s not too late then, the speed and efficiency of our response will make your head spin – but it’s going to require something huge (the total collapse of agricultural production in California, for example) before the dial is moved in a meaningful way.


    October 7, 2009 at 11:04 PM

  2. haha, much to my humiliation, I learned that far from being clever and edgy and prescient, my children have been familiar with the FSM for YEARS!

    Still, I welcome my new noodly overlord, even though it has been proven I am pathetically behind the curve.

    Paul Gilding http://paulgilding.com/cockatoo-chronicles/cc20091008climategiantawakes.html

    and my comment:China’s one-child policy was brutal but prescient. I’m not advocating dictatorship, but they do have a ruthless was of getting things done. The so-called democracy of America is ineffectual and cannot deliver real change, so far. I am still hopeful and giving Obama the benefit of the doubt, especially considering the multiple disasters he inherited upon taking office.

    But the American public is dominated by Deniers and Ignorers. Perhaps it will be that the USA is eclipsed, marginalized and impoverished as China rises and takes the lead in true clean energy progress.

    Whatever. I for one welcome our new Green Masters – or the Flying Spaghetti Monster, whichever I must submit to first!


    October 7, 2009 at 10:33 PM

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